Serenity Under Pressure

 
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill because they pissed me off.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today, as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me to always give 100% at work: 12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday, 5% on Friday.

And help me to remember: When I'm having a really bad day, and it seems that people are trying to piss me off, that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me.

80 votes, And 1038 Hits
Rating:

 .: Random 50 Funny Jokes

.: Most Popular Jokes
Another Dumb Blonde
Pencil
Dead Bird
Which girlfriend should I marry?
Rub It
70 Ways to keep a women happy
Golf and Public Restrooms
Coma
Michael Jackson's baby
Viagra Overdose

.: Highest Rated Jokes
Pharmacist Phun
Sunday School
Things Couldn't Be Nurse
OSU
The Principal of the Elementary school, went ...
Yo mama's...Ugly
Ancient Chinese Torture
Hulking Mass
Yo mama's So Short
Yo mama's...Stupid